


Running from Feeling

by copykatniss



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-17
Updated: 2015-08-28
Packaged: 2018-02-21 13:01:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 19,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2469125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/copykatniss/pseuds/copykatniss
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's only one thing Katniss dislikes more than the craft beer Gale makes in his new brewery, and that's the running club that meets at the bar each week. She might be a runner, but she certainly doesn't need companionship while she exercises. Or does she?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

She doesn’t even like craft beer. That’s what she tells Gale when he explains his latest idea to open a craft brew distillery in the heart of the Seam where they both grew up. Surly, rich Haymitch Abernathy, who despite his money has never lost ties to the area, is providing the seed money to get the brewery up and running and Katniss has to laugh because it couldn’t be more appropriate. Although she’s pretty sure Haymitch prefers a much stronger drink. 

“You’ll see, Catnip,” Gale tells her, “This is the latest trend. With all the new restaurants and businesses going in down here, a brewery is just the thing." Katniss just shakes her head. She may disagree that this is a good idea, but of course she hopes it’s a success. He is her best friend, after all. 

By the time the brewery, which Gale named “The Hob,” is up and running, there are at least five restaurants and a rock climbing business already open nearby. About 50 people show up opening night to sample one of the three offerings brewed on site. Within a week, word has spread that they’re serving one of the best beers in town, and by the next Friday night, business has doubled. 

Most of the warehouse space purchased to run the brewery is devoted to the actual brewing process, leaving only a small front space partitioned off for the bar. Despite being part of converted warehouse, Gale has managed to make the place appealing, with a large stainless steel bar and red leather covered bar stools. Teardrop style lighting illuminates the clean, open space and additional stainless steel tables provide places for large or small groups to gather and socialize. 

The more popular The Hob becomes, the more patrons spill out onto the sidewalk and it is Katniss’ idea to put tables and chairs outside for more seating. Soon Gale is re-investing profits in order to increase the number of batches he brews. When other bars in the more affluent business district start requesting his beer, he is truly in a situation where demand is greater than supply. So naturally he increases his batches yet again. 

Katniss finds herself at the brewery more often than she initially imagined. It’s actually pretty quiet during the weekdays, and only really becomes intolerable—filled with all the well-off people from the other side of town—on Friday and Saturday nights. She’s sitting at the bar on a Tuesday night, one of only about five people in the place, when Gale let’s her in on his next great idea. 

“A running club?” she asks, her voice raising several octaves in disbelief. She’s sure she heard him wrong. 

“Yeah, you see all those rich people who come down here on the weekend to eat at these restaurants and hang out in The Hob, what do you think they’re doing right now on a Tuesday night?” Gale asks, turning to replace one of the glasses he just wiped clean.

Katniss leans heavily on her elbows, which are perched on the stainless steel top of the bar. “I could give a crap what they’re doing right now,” she says with a snort. 

Gale rolls his eyes, glancing over at Haymitch who is nursing a glass of straight vodka. He’s the only person allowed to bring his own liquor into the bar and the only one who would rather drink it than the craft beers Gale has on tap. Well, except maybe Katniss, who would rather drink the cheap light beer from the bottles she gets at the grocery. 

“They’re all exercising,” Gale says, continuing his explanation. “They work all day in their stuffy office jobs and then they go home and head out on a run to blow off some steam. And also because they are very health conscious, I guess.” At this, Haymitch grunts. 

“So you want them to run around here instead?” Katniss asks, becoming exasperated. “How does that help you sell beer?”

“I read about it,” Gale tells her, turning again to replace more clean glasses on the shelf. “All these big brewing companies up in the Capitol do it all the time. What we do is host a running club—have them meet here once or twice a week—and by default we either gain customers who want a cold beer after, or if they don’t feel like drinking, they at least socialize and make the place look busy. That draws in other people and in no time we’re filling this place up on a Tuesday night.” He winks at her as if he’s just shared the secrets of the world. 

Katniss shakes her head. “I still don’t see how a running club is going to bring anything but a bunch of stuck up yuppies in here.” 

Gale sighs loudly. “You’ll see, Catnip. Besides, I thought you’d like the idea; you run all the time.”

It’s true, she does. It’s a great way to clear her mind after a long day of poring over lab results in her job as a biologist at the local university. But she prefers to run alone and not as part of some made up running club. She narrows her eyes suspiciously at Gale. “Don’t think you’re going to get me to head up this stupid running club of yours.”

Gale chuckles at her, shaking his head slightly. “Wouldn’t dream of it Catnip.”


	2. Chapter 2

The first time the running club is scheduled to meet at The Hob, Katniss purposefully avoids the place. But when the next week rolls around, she can’t help but be curious to see exactly what kind of people show up or if they even will show up. She sits in her usual place up at the bar and watches as a cheerful blond girl dressed in running gear sets up her laptop on one of the small outdoor tables, along with some name tags and markers. 

Soon others gather, most of them in their mid to late twenties, and a few slightly older or younger than average. All of them wear running gear. They stop at the table where the happy blond, whose name tag reads, “Delly” in large, bubble letters, adds their name to registration, then they join the rest of the group who are in various stages of stretching or just socializing. 

Katniss stares into her beer and pretends not to listen to their conversations, which seem to center around their careers and their pets. Not until they all take off on their run, staggered but together as a unit, does she spin around on her stool to openly take in the participants. Most are very fit, probably already avid runners and looking for companionship while they exercise. Some are obviously couples or close friends, running side by side. 

A few minutes after the last of the runners has taken off, the bar slips back into its usual weekday silence. 

“What do you think? You going to join them Sweetheart?” Haymitch smirks at her and she scowls at him in return. 

“Not a chance,” she volleys back. “I don’t need company when I run. It is, by nature, a solitary exercise.”

Haymitch only shrugs at her and goes back to reading his newspaper. 

But despite her outward disinterest, Katniss stays until the runners return. The first few show up several minutes before the main group and stand outside catching their breath and stretching near the sign-in table. She glances over, casually assessing them, when she accidentally locks eyes with a pair of stunning blue ones. They hold one another’s gaze for a beat too long before Katniss looks away, her face burning. 

When she sneaks a glance back, the blue-eyed boy is not looking her way anymore. Instead he’s laughing at something one of the other runners is saying, and she takes the opportunity to fully assess him. His short, wavy hair is pale blond and he’s not overly tall, although he has at least 6 inches of height on her. He’s also built like an athlete, but not in an over-muscled, steroid-effect sort of way. 

Sweat trickles down his neck and into the top of his t-shirt, and Katniss sucks in a breath when she sees him lift the bottom of the shirt and use it to mop off his face and neck, revealing his perfectly toned ab muscles in the process. 

Guiltily, Katniss looks away from the group. She should not be staring at people. Especially not people that make her stomach flip and her skin heat so uncomfortably. She keeps her face fixed on the book in her lap until she no longer hears the laughter and conversation from the club and she’s sure they’re all gone and it’s safe to look up again. 

…

The following Tuesday when Katniss arrives at The Hob, Delly is not set up with her laptop to greet the runners. There are still name tags and markers left out on one of the tables, though. This time, there are also orange slices, soft pretzels and water bottles on another long table, awaiting the returning runners, Katniss presumes. 

“Nice touch,” she scoffs, throwing a thumb back over her shoulder toward the snacks as she approaches the bar where Gale is restocking supplies. 

“You know can have some of the snacks if you want,” Gale teases her. “I know you’re dying to join that club.”

Katniss rolls her eyes. “I’m not interested,” she mutters. 

Gale stops and rests his hands on the bar directly across from where she sits, studying her openly. She feels her face turning red at his scrunity. “What?” she growls, louder than she intended. But Gale only chuckles and shakes his head. 

“You know, one of these days…” he begins, but stops to direct his attention to someone approaching the bar top. “Hey Peet,” he says instead, sticking his hand over the top of the bar to shake the hand of the boy approaching. 

Katniss turns to see who has taken Gale’s attention away from her and sees that the blue-eyed, blond who caught her eye the other day is now smiling and shaking Gale’s hand. 

“Hey,” the boy who is apparently named Peet says to Gale. “You sure you don’t mind us setting up the snacks?”

“Nah, man,” Gale replies. “We’re just glad to have you guys here. Good for business.” 

Suddenly, Gale turns and gestures to Katniss, who belatedly realizes she has been staring at the two men throughout the entire interaction. “Peeta Mellark, meet Katniss Everdeen. Katniss, this is Peet,” Gale says. “He’s helping head up the running club.”

Peeta puts his hand out and Katniss finds herself offering hers in return. Her hand slips neatly into his large one and she feels instantly warmer from his touch. “It’s nice to meet you Katniss,” he says. 

She thinks she murmurs something in reply, but she’s lost all capacity to think straight. He is breathtakingly beautiful. She is sure she has never seen eyes that exhibit such depth and seem to actually, literally sparkle with joy. He’s wearing a black concert t-shirt that highlights his toned chest and contrasts with his pale hair, which is currently tousled in a way that makes it appear as if he just rolled out of bed. 

As soon as their hands break contact, Katniss’ eyes skitter away, looking anywhere but at Peeta. He is almost too attractive to look at for very long, she thinks. And she has never thought that about another man before. 

She hears Gale and Peeta continue a brief conversation before Peeta walks away, but Katniss pretends to be preoccupied with checking the messages on her phone. When she finally looks up, Gale is smirking at her from behind the bar. 

“What?” she says. 

“I didn’t say anything,” Gale says, but he’s clearly laughing at her. And she knows he’s making fun of her when he hands her a stack of bar napkins and says, “Here. For the drool.”

She responds by picking up her glass of water and her book and moving to a nearby table, with her back to the bar. 

….

Peeta is apparently in charge of the check-in table tonight and he greets everyone who shows up to run with a friendly smile and easy banter. From her table, Katniss can’t help but sneak glances his way every few minutes. His enthusiasm is both unnerving and contagious. 

When it seems like most everyone who is going to run tonight has arrived, Peeta stacks up the name tags and gathers the markers and moves to toss them in a box where Gale has been keeping them behind the bar. Katniss tries to keep her eyes carefully trained on her book when he passes, but she can’t help but look up just as he reaches her table. He’s looking right at her, almost as if he was waiting for her to look up. 

He smiles widely at her but doesn’t stop walking. She hears him tossing the name tags and markers into the box. She tries, she really does, but she can’t help but stare at the way his backside fills out his athletic shorts as he makes his way past her again to head back outside.


	3. Chapter 3

3  
Katniss is just finishing a four-mile run when she jogs up the sidewalk right outside The Hob. She tries to tell herself that it’s just a coincidence that she ran over to the bar on running club night. She’s ended her run here lots of times in the past, rather than drive over. It has nothing to do with a blue-eyed, blond who just might be setting up the check-in table tonight. 

But he’s not at the check-in table; Delly’s there instead. The snacks are all set up inside: orange slices, the big soft pretzels and water again. Katniss finds herself drawn to the aroma of freshly baked bread and she edges over to the snack table out of curiosity. Could these pretzels possibly be homemade? She touches the edge of one and finds it still warm. She’s just about to pick it up when a voice startles her from behind. 

“You’ll have to tell me what you think,” Peeta says. 

Katniss’ fingers edge back from the table. “Oh, um, I’m not in the club,” she mumbles.

“It’s fine,” he says, and she can actually hear the smile in his voice. 

She chances a quick look at him, and yes, he’s still gorgeous, today in a faded blue t-shirt and gray baseball cap. Holy shit, she’s never seen anyone that looks as good as this boy. 

“You, uh…you’re a runner, too?” Peeta asks. He picks up the pretzel she was eyeing earlier and extends his hand, offering it to her. 

“Thanks,” she whispers, barely audible. She takes the pretzel and tears off a bite, popping it into her mouth. Immediately her eyes widen. It’s really, really good. 

Peeta laughs, and if she thought his face was carved by angels then she most definitely thinks his laughter is one of the most beautiful sounds she’s ever heard. 

“So what do you think? Does it need more salt?” he asks and she gives him a curious look. 

She shrugs, not willing to commit to having an actual conversation with this overly friendly Greek god. He’s way out of her league anyway, she thinks. He’s probably with that Delly chick. 

“Well, have as many as you want,” Peeta continues, when it’s clear she isn’t going to speak up. “And you should run with us sometime. We’d love to have you join us.” 

“Maybe,” she says softly, still not looking him in the eye. She gives him one more barely polite nod before she walks away. 

….

She keeps tabs on him, after that; she can’t help it. Even though she won’t talk to him and he tries to talk to her every single time he sees her in the bar.

She watches as he interacts with the other runners; she watches him stretch before he runs; she watches him set out the snacks early before the other runners arrive. She knows that he drives a rather beat up vintage looking Jeep and that he keeps the music up really loud but he always turns it down just as he turns into the parking lot. 

She sees him staring at her, but he always looks away when she notices and she pretends right back that she never saw him. When he does approach her, she barely looks at him—it’s like looking into a blinding light! But he’s unfailingly polite. Continuing to ask her questions about how her week is going, despite her one-word responses. 

It’s gotten to the point where she inwardly groans when she sees him coming—both uneasy and excited by his presence. And yet she hasn’t missed the chance to be at the bar on running club night in a long time. Gale and Haymitch have both noticed. 

“Looks like your boy is right on time,” Haymitch says, gesturing toward the glass windows where Peeta’s Jeep just pulled up outside, without even looking up from his paper.

Katniss snorts. “Are you talking to me?”

“That’s why you’re here, isn’t it?” Haymitch returns. “To pretend that you don’t notice him while you secretly track his every move around this bar?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Katniss says, but the fire has gone out of her voice. 

“He’s a good kid. You should give him a chance,” is all Haymitch says. Then he folds up his paper and tips it in her direction before he takes off out the back door. 

Gale comes into the front room from the warehouse just as Haymitch is leaving and Katniss is already abandoning her spot at the bar. “What? Leaving already?” he asks her. “You’ll miss the snacks.” She doesn’t miss the sarcastic tone of his voice or the smirk on his face. 

“Screw you,” she retorts.

“You missed your chance a long time ago,” Gale throws right back, but he’s laughing and she knows he’s just messing with her. It’s true that he once had feelings for her that went much deeper than their long-standing friendship, but one kiss proved that there was absolutely no romantic chemistry between the two of them. 

She rolls her eyes at him now and bends to pick up her bag from the floor where it lays. At that exact moment Peeta enters the bar, and although Katniss misses the appreciative glance he gives her backside as she retrieves her bag, Gale certainly does not. 

“What’s up man,” he says to Peeta, whose eyes immediately dart to Gale’s face, a bit of guilt discernable in the vivid blue hue. 

“Not much,” Peeta returns. 

Katniss’ back stiffens, hearing Peeta’s voice, and she braces herself for yet another awkward encounter where she can barely speak and bumbles over her words when she does. She turns slowly, hoisting her bag onto her shoulder and biting her lip as she glances at Peeta. As soon as he catches her eye he gives her a small, shy smiles and lifts his hand in a short wave as a greeting. 

She returns the gesture, lifting her hand in a quick greeting, then turns to Gale. “I’m headed out,” she says. “See you tomorrow.” 

“Bye Catnip,” Gale says, but the smirk is still on his face. 

Head down, Katniss makes her way toward the door, passing Peeta who seems frozen in the same spot since he entered. She can feel his eyes following her progress and she tries, she really does, but she can’t help but glance at him when she passes him. He’s staring right at her with a very earnest look on his face, that she can’t quite decipher. And it’s perhaps because she’s puzzling over this, but mostly because she’s not watching where she’s going, that the next thing she knows she has walked right into the glass door leading outside. 

She feels the clunk of the cool glass making contact with her face, and although she wasn’t walking very fast and she didn’t hit her head very hard, it still shocks her and hurts, too. “Fuck!” she says, reflexively putting her hand up to touch her forehead where it knocked into the glass. 

Peeta is immediately by her side. “Oh my God are you okay?” he asks. His hand is on her shoulder and suddenly her face is numb and the only thing she can feel is the place where his hand rests against her shirt. She’s certain her face is as red as a tomato now and she can’t look him in the face. 

“I’m fine,” she says. “Thanks.” Her eyes flit up to his concerned ones quickly and then she pushes open the door and hurries out.   
‘What in the hell is wrong with me?’ she thinks. If there was any doubt before, she’s certain now that Peeta Mellark must think she is a complete idiot.


	4. Chapter 4

The bump on her head has faded by the next Tuesday, even if the memory of the embarrassing incident with the door has not. Katniss takes off on a run from her apartment, heading in the general direction of The Hob. It’s only about two miles from her place, and she’s not quite ready to stop so she keeps right on going when she reaches the brewery. She can circle back and end up there again after another mile or so. 

She’s at least another mile and a half into her run when she sees him running toward her. At first she isn’t sure if it’s actually Peeta, but the closer his figure gets, the better she can make out those blond curls and the toned physique that she’s practically memorized from weeks of pretending not to stare at him. She can’t imagine why he would be running toward The Hob, especially since the running club is set to start running from there in about an hour. 

For a second she thinks about turning around, or just ducking in between two houses and waiting until he passes, but she hesitates and then he’s close enough to recognize her so it’s too late. She can tell that he’s surprised to see her coming toward him as well. But his face lights up in a big grin and he slows to a jog as they come face to face on the sidewalk. She has no choice but to stop and acknowledge him, no matter how mortified she still is about running into the glass door and no matter how badly she imagines she must look in her sweat soaked tank top right now. 

“Katniss!” he greets. “How are you?”

“Good,” she replies. “Just…” she gestures vaguely back toward where she ran from, catching her breath. “…finishing up.” 

“Headed back to The Hob?” he asks, and somehow he doesn’t seem the least bit winded from his run. She nods. 

“Same,” he says, still smiling brightly at her. “If you’re ready to turn around we can go together.” 

“What are you doing here?” she blurts out, not meaning for it to sound as rude as it must. 

He chuckles softly, ignoring her abruptness. “Ah, actually I’m having some work done on my Jeep so I’m on foot for a few days. And it’s not really that far.” 

“Where do you live?” Katniss asks, and then realizing how awkward that sounds she retracts. “I mean…I live nearby, too. Uh, never mind.” She stares at her feet as she scrapes the toes of her New Balance along the sidewalk, first one foot, then the other. 

“Really? That’s cool,” says Peeta. “And convenient, since Gale is probably always at the brewery.”

Her head snaps up and she gives him what must be the most confused look, “Huh?” she says. 

It’s hard to tell, since he’s been running, but Katniss thinks Peeta may be blushing. “Um, well, should we take off?” he says, gesturing toward The Hob. 

“Sure,” she says and together they start a slow jog heading in the direction she just came from. 

It’s quiet for several minutes, except for the sound of their feet hitting the pavement and their breathing. She’s just debating if it would be rude to put her ear buds back in to listen to her iPod when he breaks the silence. “So, how many miles do you usually cover?” he says, glancing over at her and then back to the road in front of him. 

“About four,” she says. “Sometimes more.”

She knows she’s probably supposed to ask him a question now, to be polite, but she’s just not very good at this sort of thing. Practically every time she talks to him she says something stupid, or she chokes on her own words. This conversation is just about the most successful one they’ve had and she’s not really willing to risk messing it up, especially since they still have about a mile to cover before she can escape his undivided attention. 

It’s quiet for a few more minutes and then he speaks up again. “You should run with the club sometime. We’re always looking for new members and you’re already at The Hob,” he says. She makes the mistake of glancing over at him and he smiles at her. “And there’s snacks after,” he says, in a teasing voice. 

But she’s having a hard time focusing on what he’s saying because she’s watching the sweat that is glistening on his temple….and Oh my God is that the pale blond beginnings of a beard on his face? It looks like he hasn’t shaved in a few days and it’s just the right amount of scruff to make him look a little more rugged than usual. 

“So what do you think?” he’s asking and she has to really focus to remember what exactly he’s talking about. Her eyes narrow and she bites her lip in concentration. 

“Sure, yeah,” she answers. “Maybe sometime.” But if her heart rate right now is any indication, she should probably never run with Peeta Mellark again. 

….

He doesn’t leave with the other runners when they take off from The Hob a half hour later. Instead he sits down two seats from Katniss at the bar where she has parked herself for the evening. She glances at him curiously and he looks at her with what appears to be a mixture of shyness and hesitation. He’s just opening his mouth to speak when she dives down toward her feet and starts digging around in her bag for her book. She hears him clear his throat and when she’s upright again, he’s drumming his fingers on the bar lightly, his eyes flitting around the bar looking everywhere but her. 

Gale comes from the back at that moment. “Oh hey Peet,” he says. “Sorry I just stepped into the back for a sec. What do you need? How come you aren’t out running with the rest of the group?”

“Ah, actually I ran a little earlier,” Peeta replies, glancing over at Katniss, who happens to be stealing a look at him at that very moment. She quickly averts her eyes and tries to focus on the book she has perched on the edge of the bar top. 

“Well in that case, can I offer you a post-run drink?” Gale asks. “I was just about to pour one for Katniss here.”

At her name, Katniss snaps her head up and stares at Gale. The look she gives him clearly says, “What the hell are you doing?” and “Stop now or I’m going to kill you later.”

“Sure,” Peeta says, although he doesn’t sound overly sure. Gale pours too tall ambers and sets one in front of Katniss and the other in front of the seat directly next to hers. Peeta hesitates before sliding over to take the stool next to Katniss, in front of the offered drink. He smiles at her before lifting the glass and taking a long sip. 

“I don’t think I’ve had the Amber yet,” Peeta remarks. “You guys sure know what you’re doing back there. This is delicious.”

“Thanks,” Gale replies. “It’s Katniss’ favorite.”

“If by favorite, you mean the only one of your beers that I’ll drink,” Katniss quickly retorts. 

Gale snorts. “Be wary of this one,” he gestures toward Katniss but he’s talking to Peeta. “She’s a little rough around the edges. Likes to give her friends hell all the time.” 

“Maybe I just need new friends,” Katniss tries to sound more abrasive than she actually feels and she bites her lip to keep a smile from forming. She and Gale love to play with each other this way. Even if he is irritating her right now, he’s still her best friend. 

Peeta laughs, a little uneasily and just barely shakes his head. “I don’t know, she seems friendly enough to me, but you would know better, Gale. You two have been together—how long?” 

“We are NOT together,” Katniss says forcefully before Gale has a chance to respond. 

Gale’s laughter comes out in a loud bark. “Don’t make it sound like such an insult, Catnip,” he says. He looks at Peeta, then. “But, nah, man, we’re not together…like that. We’ve just known each other for a long, long time.”

“Oh,” is all Peeta says and then he seems to become very interested in taking a rather long drink of his beer. 

Gale chuckles again lightly and makes one last swipe across the bar top with the rag he’s been holding. “Well I’ll leave you two to your drinks, then. I have to grab a few more things in the back.” He winks at Katniss and walks away, leaving her to stew over her beer with a bright red face. 

“So,” Peeta chances. “If this isn't your thing (he lifts his glass a little to indicate the craft beer), what do you like to drink?”

She grips her glass tightly in her hand, takes another tiny sip before answering. “Um, I don’t know. I’m not really a beer drinker, I guess? Well, I mean, I do like to drink beer but this stuff is so…” she struggles to explain herself. 

“I know what you mean,” Peeta rescues her. She glances up at him now and he’s rotated his body a little toward her and is focused on her with those piercing blue eyes. “I can only drink one or two because they tend to be heavier than the generic beer you can buy at the grocery.”

“Yes! Exactly!” she exclaims, glad that someone actually agrees with her. It seems that everyone else she knows is a huge craft beer enthusiast and can’t understand why she can only stomach one at a time. In her excitement in finally having an ally on this point, and perhaps a little bit because of the effects of the fresh brewed amber liquid itself, she begins to let her guard down just a bit. 

“So have you tried the stout?” she asks Peeta. “It’s really awful.” She tries and fails not to notice the way his tongue darts out to lick his lips after he takes another sip of his beer. 

Peeta laughs. “Shhh, be careful. The master brewer could come back at any moment.” She laughs, too and she notices that Peeta’s eyes seem to crinkle a bit more and his smile grows a little wider. 

It’s a little bit hard for her to admit, but she’s actually enjoying herself, talking like this with Peeta. But soon the runners from the running club start to trickle back in, finished for the evening. Peeta glances behind him and when he spots Delly among the group that has just arrived he excuses himself from Katniss for a moment and heads over to greet Delly. 

Katniss tries not to watch the interaction between Peeta and Delly. Delly is laughing and she has her hand on Peeta’s arm, while Peeta is animatedly telling her a story. Katniss turns away, defeated. She had forgotten about Delly. Smiling, bubbly, perfect Delly, whom Peeta is most likely dating or if not, then he probably wants to be. 

She’s so busy glowering into her beer and thinking these thoughts that she’s startled when he slips back onto the seat next to hers. “Did I scare you?” he asks, a hint of laughter in his voice. “What were you thinking about? You looked so serious.”

And just like that she’s a deer in headlights again, staring at Peeta Mellark and wondering what in the world she could possibly say that will not sound as awkward as her reality: which is that she’s beginning to think she may have a mad crush on this boy.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took a little longer to update this time! Thanks for reading!

Katniss runs the same route on Thursday, hoping Peeta’s jeep is still in the shop and she’ll run into him again. He has the same idea and she has a hard time suppressing her smile of relief when she sees him running toward her about a half mile from The Hob. Once again they both slow as they approach each other and then stop completely when they are face to face. 

“Hey,” he says. “I was hoping I’d see you out here again.” 

Katniss is taken aback that he’s basically just voiced her exact thoughts. “You were?” she asks, a bit of shyness and incredulity edging her voice. 

“Yeah, I was,” Peeta says and he gives her a big, blinding grin. She has to physically bite back the urge to ask him why. 

In unspoken agreement they begin to jog back toward The Hob together. “How many miles have you done so far?” Peeta asks her. 

“Just two,” she responds, glancing over at him. He’s looking straight ahead but she can see that he’s grinning again. 

“So that means you’re plenty rested to join the running club for a few more?” he asks. There’s just a hint of teasing in his voice, combined with what sounds like hope. 

“Oh, uh, uh, no,” she stumbles. She sees his face fall and she looks away with a frown of her own. “I, uh, promised Gale I’d keep an eye on things out front tonight. He’s giving a tour to some distributors; showing them the brewing process.” 

Peeta nods thoughtfully, biting his lower lip. “That’s nice of you,” he finally says. 

She’s not sure if it’s because she wants to bring back his smile, or if she’s just looking for ways to spend more time in his presense but she suddenly blurts, “I can run next time. On Tuesday.”

And just like that his grin is back. “Really? That’d be great!” he says. 

“I mean, I’m going to be running anyway,” she concedes. 

“You’ll love it,” he tells her. “Running with a group is more fun than running alone.” 

“Maybe,” she says skeptically. But he flashes her another spectacular smile and she forgets why she was ever reluctant in the first place. 

….

She shows up at the brewery right on time to meet the running club on Tuesday. Peeta is working the check-in table and he beams when he sees her and waves her over. “Katniss! Glad you’re here!” he says loudly and she ducks her head a little, her face flushing as she makes her way over. 

“Hi,” she says shyly. “Do I need to sign up, or…?” She trails off, unsure. 

“Yeah,” he smiles up at her from his seat and then pushes the sign-in sheet in her direction so she can add her name and contact info. “We just like to keep track of who’s out there; no man left behind, you know?” His eyes crinkle at the edges and she finds herself smiling back at him without even thinking about it. 

“Sure, that makes sense,” she replies, quickly writing her first and last name and adding her cell number. 

She pauses on the line that asks for an email address. As if psychic he quickly speaks up. “You don’t need to add your email unless you want to receive the group emails we send out.” 

“Oh,” she says, her fingers hovering over the page for a moment more before she decides that, no, she doesn’t really want the group emails. She doesn’t really even want to run with the group. She’s only doing this because HE asked. This is completely ridiculous, she thinks. I don’t do things like this just because of a boy. 

Her head is shaking back and forth ever so slightly with her inner thoughts and he must notice because he clears his throat suddenly to get her attention. It’s only then she realizes he’s waiting to take back the sheet of paper so the next person can sign in. “Oh sorry!” she says, releasing her grip on it and pushing it back in his direction. 

“No worries,” Peeta replies, a small smirk on his face. He turns slightly to hand the paper to the person on his right and then turns back to face Katniss. But she’s already walking away to the back of the bar.

She hangs out alone, away from the other runners, for the 15 or so minutes until it’s time to take off. Peeta is busy with the sign-in sheet, sitting at the front table where he’s surrounded by other runners all laughing and talking easily. Several times she sees him glance back to where she hovers in the corner, but each time she pretends to be preoccupied, either tying her shoe or stretching her legs. 

It has suddenly occurred to her that Peeta might want to run together and the thought makes her somehow queasy. So when she sees him take the sign-in sheet to put it back in its spot behind the bar, she does what any nervous, awkward person would do: she bolts. 

She heads straight to the bathroom, where she goes through the motions of washing her hands, even though there’s no need. Then she waits a few extra minutes for good measure. Only when she’s sure that most of the runners have likely taken off, does she exit the bathroom. She sees the last of them passing the front window as they begin their run and she breathes a sigh of relief. 

“Hiding from someone, sweetheart?” Haymitch says, the amused smirk on his face making his statement even more annoying. 

She gives him her usual scowl and heads to the door. She did say she’d run, so she plans to join the tail end of the group. 

“Better hurry if you want to catch up,” she hears Haymitch toss over his shoulder as the door closes behind her. 

The last of the running group is only about a quarter mile ahead of her and she has to slow her pace or she’s going to catch up soon. And then what? What do you say to a group of strangers who you just happen to be running down the street with? She’s still not sure she gets the point of all this. 

She’s only gone a mile when Peeta doubles back on purpose to find her. He falls in next to her and runs with her for several minutes before he says anything. “Sorry I didn’t wait for you,” he says. “Where’d you go?”  
“There was no need,” she says, almost too quickly. And then, because she’s not trying to be rude she adds, “I was washing my hands.”

“That’s good,” he says casually. “Clean hands help you run faster, I hear.” 

She lets out a little laugh at his silly attempt at a joke and glances over at him. He looks good—too good—as usual. He has on dark green running shorts and a gray t-shirt today. Sweat is just starting to form along his hairline, his blond curls beginning to stick ever so slightly.

Katniss has a sudden urge to reach over and smooth those curls back off his forehead. As if he heard her thoughts, Peeta looks over at her in this moment. The realization of what she was just thinking makes her flush hot all over and then, to her horror, she actually trips. 

“Nooooooooo” is all she can think as she feels herself pitch forward unsteadily and watches the pavement rise up to meet her face. And then, almost as quickly as she began to fall, she’s upright again. A strong arm is wrapped around her middle, holding her steady. She looks up into eyes as deep and blue as the ocean, her breath coming hard from both the near disastrous fall and the running. “You okay?” Peeta says.

No, she thinks. No, and I don’t think I’m going to be, ever again.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry it has taken me longer than usual to update this story!

Katniss is staring into space again. It seems to be happening on a regular basis now, a fact that her coworker, Joanna can’t help but point out. 

“What’s got your panties in a bunch?” Joanna says, giving Katniss a little shove as she passes her in the lab. 

Katniss only scowls, but she knows eventually Joanna will wear her down and get it out of her so she may as well give in. Turning toward the slight brunette, Katniss leans against the countertop and sighs. 

Joanna is busy replacing samples, but she still gestures with her left hand, making a rotating motion. “Go on, give it up,” she says. 

“Okay,” Katniss retorts. “But you CAN NOT make fun of me or repeat a word of this to Gale.”

At this Joanna stops replacing the samples immediately and turns to give Katniss her undivided attention, crossing her arms and raising an eyebrow. “So it’s a boy,” she states, rather than questions. And then, mostly under her breath she says, “Finally.”

“I heard that,” says Katniss. “And yes. Sort of. I mean, he’s a boy, yes. Peeta. His name is Peeta and he’s in this running club that meets at The Hob and every time I talk to him I injure myself and I just can’t figure out why he seems to keep wanting to talk to me again---“

“Whoa there, take a breath,” Joanna interrupts her. A sly smile makes its way across her face. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this worked up before brainless. Must be quite a guy.” 

But Katniss only shrugs, closing off again. She’s admitted more out loud than she had even previously admitted to herself. 

“Oh come on,” Joanna teases. “You’re going to have to give me more than that. Is he hot?”

Her answer is the fuchsia color that Katniss’ skin seems to be turning just thinking about it. 

…..

“So Joanna says you went on some rant at work about the bread boy,” Gale says, almost before she can even slide into her usual spot at the bar. 

Katniss feels her face freeze in mortification. What the hell, Johanna? 

“Don’t worry, Catnip. She’s only looking out for your best interest. That, and she couldn’t freakin believe you were this torn up over some guy,” he adds. He raises and eyebrow at her. “So tell me—do you have a crush on Peeta?”

Katniss glowers at him. “It doesn’t matter,” she grits out between her teeth. 

“So you like him,” Gale says matter of factly. 

She’s been staring at her arms, which are folded across her chest, but she raises her head just slightly to peer up at Gale, who takes that as affirmation. 

“Well why don’t you talk to him then?” Gale asks. “Poor guy gets within five feet of you and you either develop a stutter or turn into a walking 9-1-1 emergency.” 

“Because Gale,” Katniss say, her arms flapping now at her sides in exasperation. “He’s into that Delly girl. Or one of the other 500 pretty girls who are always laughing with him.” She huffs in frustration. “And anyway, I don’t date.” She hates talking about these types of things, especially with Gale. It was bad enough with Joanna. 

Gale is currently looking at her like she is the most simple-minded person on the face of the earth. “Oh, Katniss. Sweet, sweet Katniss,” he says, shaking his head in mock defeat. 

“What?!” she says, glaring at him. 

“You are just so perpetually clueless,” he says and then he turns and starts working on stocking the back of the bar. 

“Then enlighten me,” she says petulantly, like a child. 

“I would,” says Gale, his mood brightening suddenly and a smirk overtaking his features. “But I think I’ll let him do it.” At this he points toward the front of the room where Peeta is just making his way through the door. 

Katniss feels her cheeks flaming with heat and she picks at her nails, pretending not to care that Peeta is headed directly toward the seat next to hers. 

….

They run together every Tuesday and Thursday and she finds herself enjoying the routine and even looking forward to it. Neither one talks very much, mostly because they are running, but little by little she learns more about him. Like the fact that he and his brothers run a bakery, and that he has an art degree from UCLA. 

She shares just little with him, as well. She tells him about her job, and that she and Gale sometimes take out stress at the archery range just around the corner from The Hob. But she still keeps the really important things guarded. Like how she can still hear her sister’s laughter in her dreams, and how her throat still gets tight every time she pulls her father’s old hunting jacket on to ward off chilly weather. She’s not sure she’ll ever be able to share certain parts of herself again. 

It’s a Tuesday and she’s been looking forward to seeing him; even she can admit that after four days she misses his warm smile and those sparkling eyes. He’s really grown on her. She’s gone from lusting after his good looks to genuinely admiring him and wanting to learn more about him. So the disappointment when she’s the text message is enough to effectively turn her mouth downward in a heavy frown. 

[unknown number] Hey Katniss, it’s Peeta. Gale gave me your number. I’m really sorry but I can’t meet to run tonight. Just wanted to let you know not to wait on me.

She doesn’t respond, but she does add his number to her contacts. 

A little later that night her phone pings again with an incoming message. 

[Peeta] Hope you got my message earlier. Sorry I missed. Hope your run was good.

This time she responds. 

[Katniss] It’s ok. I was busy too.

[Peeta] Oh? Well, see you Thursday!

[Katniss] see ya

She doesn’t tell him that she didn’t really feel like running without him. That running with him has become one of the best parts of her week. That she’s desperate to know why he had to miss tonight, but she won’t dare ever ask. Because she’s just not good at saying something.


	7. Chapter 7

She arrives at The Hob extremely early on Thursday, hoping to spend a little time with Gale. He’s been so busy lately, fixated really, with running the brewery. Ever since business basically exploded, she feels like she only ever sees him in five minute increments, as he darts in and out from the back of the warehouse to the bar. 

Late afternoons are a good time to catch him; the brewery is in a lull before the running club crowd and the happy hour folks start pouring in later. Today Katniss actually spends some time helping Gale restock and they catch up on what’s going on other than the expansion of the brewery. He asks her about her work in the lab and she gets caught up on news of his younger brothers and baby sister. 

“So when are you going to have time to go shoot again?” Katniss asks him. 

Gale runs a hand through his hair, looking sheepish. “Jeez, I don’t even know Catnip. I feel like all I have time for anymore is eating and running this place. I barely even get to sleep.”

“You need to hire on some more help,” Katniss offers, pointing out the obvious. 

“You’re right, I know,” he responds. “Especially if I ever hope to have a life. Or date again.”

At this she raises her eyebrows. Gale has never had a problem getting women to notice him, but Katniss realizes suddenly that he’s right—he hasn’t dated in months. He practically lives in this brewery. “I could bring Jo down here again,” she offers, teasing. 

“God no,” he huffs. “You might recall that did not work out very well last time.”

She laughs at the memory of Gale and Jo and the combustion that was their equally fiery personalities coming head to head. 

“At least the sex was good,” Gale muses, almost as if he forgot Katniss was standing there. 

“Ewww! Things I do not need to know!” she says, exasperated. 

“What about you? Been out with the baker boy yet?” Gale asks. 

“What? No!” she says a little too quickly and a little too forcefully. 

Gale holds up his hands, defensively. “Okayyyy, I just thought you two had been spending some time together and you seemed pretty friendly the other week when you were drinking in here together…” He trails off. 

“It’s nothing,” Katniss says, unconvincingly. 

Gale only smirks at her and changes the subject. 

…  
An hour later Katniss retreats to the restroom to change into her running gear before the rest of the running group arrives. Peeta must have arrived while she was changing because when she pushes open the bathroom door she hears his voice, talking to Gale at the bar. She doesn’t mean to linger behind the wall that separates the restrooms from the open area out front, but she can’t help it when she hears what Gale is saying. 

“So I was asking Katniss earlier when the two of you are going to get your shit together and go out already,” Gale is saying. 

“Ahhh, well,” stammers Peeta. “To be honest, I’m not sure she would be all that interested.” 

“She’s interested, trust me,” says Gale. 

“I don’t know. I’m getting a ‘we’re friends, but that’s all’ sort of vibe,” says Peeta. “I don’t want to push her and wind up ruining our friendship when it’s only just started.”

“Nah man, she’s just really clueless about this stuff,” Gale replies. “Go ahead and ask her out. Just go slow and she’ll come around.”

Katniss can’t stay still any longer, afraid of what else she’ll hear if she doesn’t make herself known. She steps around from behind the wall, pretending to have just left the restroom area and plasters a fake smile on her face. 

“All set,” she says, in what she hopes is a casual tone. “Oh, hey Peeta.”

Peeta is blushing, probably worried she has overheard their conversation, but she pretends not to notice. 

……

Katniss spends the entire run worrying that Peeta will ask her out, now that Gale has so inelegantly tried to persuade him to do so. She’s so sure that every next word out of his mouth will be an invitation to some cheesy, romantic dinner date that she hardly hears a word of what he’s actually saying. 

But he never does ask her out, even after they make it back to the Hob and share a soft pretzel and a post-run beer. She tries to feel relieved, but in reality she’s perplexed. She didn’t want him to ask her out on a date, did she? So why does she feel…disappointed in a way?

….

She’s not overly surprised to see that the text message lighting up her phone Friday night is from Peeta. They do text occasionally on the days they don’t run together. She pauses the movie she’s watching—who knew that ‘Bridget Jones Diary’ could be so entertaining the twentieth time she’s seen it—and pulls up his text message. 

Peeta: Up for an unscheduled run tomorrow?

Katniss: I could do that

Peeta: Great! Mind meeting me at the bakery? I have to get some things started but was planning to take off from there. 8:30?

Katniss: Sounds good. Address? 

Peeta: 214 Sycamore. See you then! :-)

Katniss: :-)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy weekend everyone! :-)

She arrives at the bakery at 8:25 on the dot. 

It’s a red brick building anchoring the corner of a historic merchant street set in the middle of one of the nicer residential neighborhoods. Next door on one side is a dusty little bookshop that Katniss wouldn’t mind exploring on another day. Along both front walls of the bakery are large, deep windows displaying beautifully decorated layered cakes, as well as tarts and pastries of every imaginable kind. 

Katniss pulls open the large, heavy wooden door and is immediately struck by the delicious, heady scent of cinnamon and baking bread. She takes in the black and white tile floor, the old-fashioned display cases under the marble countertop and the large, hand painted sign reading, “Welcome to Mellark’s.” 

There’s no one behind the counter at the moment, but there is a bell available to ring for service. She’s perusing the wooden racks filled with various loaves of bread—white, honey whole wheat, cinnamon raisin, pumpernickel—when Peeta clears his throat behind her. 

She turns, giving him a small smile. “So many choices,” she remarks, referring to the vast display of freshly baked bread.

“Would you like to try a slice of something?” Peeta asks sincerely. 

Katniss gives him a smile in return. “No, thank you. Better not before we run,” she explains. 

“Ok, well…ready to head out then?” he asks. 

…

They run about two miles and then head back toward the bakery to make it an even four. The area around the bakery is mostly quiet, tree lined streets, providing a nice canopy of filtered sunlight that seems somehow magical. It’s early enough in the day that the two do not break much of a sweat, especially on the well-shaded route. 

Katniss has just drained the last of her water bottle and finished her cool down stretches when she inadvertently gives Peeta the opening he needs to invite her to stick around for a while. “Well, now I’m starving,” she says. 

Peeta’s face lights up in a grin. “Come on inside, I’ll get us a snack,” he says, opening the bakery door. 

“Oh, I didn’t mean…” Katniss is mortified to have suggested that he should give her free bakery treats. She would have to go and open her big mouth and say something about being hungry when they’re standing right in front of his bakery. 

“No, really,” says Peeta, and there is such sincerity in his voice that she can hardly doubt him. “I was hoping you’d help me eat a few extra cheese buns. I made too many this morning.” 

He has her at the mention of cheese buns, even if he doesn’t realize it just yet. 

“Well, okay,” she relents. 

….

He leads her through the front of the bakery, past the counter where he gives a brief introduction to two members of the staff, and into the kitchen. There she finds another blond, blue-eyed man wearing a white chef’s coat, maneuvering large baking trays out of an industrial sized oven. 

“Hey baby brother,” the man greets over his shoulder. “Thanks for all the extra prep work this morning.” He turns and sets the large tray on one of the huge wire racks and then grins at the two standing in the doorway in their running gear. “Oh, hey! Who’s your friend?” he says in an amicable tone. 

“Rye, this is Katniss. Katniss, this is my brother, Rye,” says Peeta. 

“It’s nice to finally meet you Katniss,” Rye says, extending his hand in greeting. Katniss briefly frowns, wondering what he means by “finally” but she schools her features back to neutral in time to shake his hand. 

“You too,” she says quietly. 

“We’re just gonna grab a snack in the back,” Peeta explains to Rye. Then he takes Katniss’ hand and sort of pulls her along through a door in the back of the kitchen. Katniss is too busy wondering about Rye’s comment to register that Peeta is holding her hand until he has already let go. But once he does let go, she immediately misses his touch. 

“Two kitchens?” she asks, looking around at this back room, which is essentially another kitchen, with large stainless steel work tops and several more industrial size ovens. There are also boxes stacked several rows high against the back wall and a small table with a few chairs scattered around near a door that appears to lead out to the back of the building. 

“Uh, yeah, this was the original kitchen, actually. But back in the 80s business expanded and my Dad ended up adding the extra ovens in what used to be the storage room,” Peeta explains. 

Katniss nods in understanding. Peeta disappears into one of the walk in refrigerators and comes back in a second carrying a tray filled with uncooked rolls of some type. He pops them into one of the preheated ovens and turns to her. “Have a seat,” he says with a smile, gesturing to the table she noticed earlier. 

“Are you, um, too hot for hot chocolate?” he asks, bending down to retrieve a small pan from one of the cabinets. Katniss tries not to stare at his sculpted body, on perfect display in his current position, but she really can’t help it. She’s never had this problem before—this inability to stop staring at a guy. What is it about Peeta that has her so…distracted?

“Katniss?” Peeta inquires, when she doesn’t answer his previous question. He turns and catches her staring and she flushes all over when she sees the small upturn of his lips that reveals he noticed. 

“Oh, uh, sure. Not too hot. I mean, it’s hot…outside…and it’s warm in here. But I’m not hot. I mean…” she struggles to form a coherent sentence under his knowing gaze. 

“We’ll let it cool down quite a bit,” Peeta explains. “But it’s just really good for dipping the cheese buns. They’ll be ready in just a few minutes. They are better straight out of the oven.” 

Katniss nods mutely, still embarrassed by the fact that he caught her obviously staring. 

Peeta gives an easy laugh and begins pulling out milk and cocoa to prepare the hot chocolate on the stovetop. He’s making homemade hot chocolate, Katniss marvels. What can this guy NOT do?

Peeta works effortlessly, adding a bit of heavy cream and some spices to the chocolate mixture. He has Katniss fetch two mugs from one cabinet and some plates from another, pulling her into the process of putting together the snack and helping to put her at ease. She pours the chocolate into the mugs and sets them on the table to cool while he pulls the cheese buns out of the oven, declaring them ready to eat. 

They sit together at the corner of the table, their knees brushing as he demonstrates tearing off a bite of the savory cheese bun and dipping it into the rich, creamy chocolate. She’s watching his every move, fully expecting him to pop the bite into his mouth, when he surprises her. “Open,” he says playfully, angling the bite toward her lips. 

Caught off guard, she does exactly as he says, opening her mouth and accepting the delicious treat. It literally melts on her tongue and causes her to moan in unrestrained appreciation. 

He raises his eyebrows and his lips quirk up in a smile. “You like?” he asks, but it’s clear that he knows the answer. 

“Oh my god, this is amazing Peeta. I’ll just take all of these,” she says, grabbing the plate of cheese buns and dragging it toward herself in a teasing gesture. 

Peeta laughs in response and playfully tugs the plate back toward himself. “It’s not good to eat too much after a run,” he teases back. “Better limit you to just one.” 

She shakes her head, unable to contain the laughter that bubbles up. “No way!” she counters, tugging back on the plate with one hand while stuffing another large bite of a cheese bun into her mouth with the other. “I’ll need at least ten of these. Remember, I’m starving,” she says, dragging out the last part in a teasing voice. 

“Maybe we can make a deal,” Peeta says, a glint in his eye. He leans forward conspiratorially, arms folded in front of him on the table and looks at her in mock seriousness. “How about you agree to share these today, and in return I’ll make you cheese buns anytime you like?” 

“Deal,” says Katniss gleefully. “But I have to warn you: I’ll need them every day.” 

“That can be arranged,” says Peeta, giving her a sweet smile. “I’ll bake for you all the time if it means I get to see you every day.” 

Katniss flushes all over, but she is having too good of a time with Peeta, and enjoying the chocolate and cheese buns too much, to worry over his obvious flirting. Instead she sends him another smile and stuffs even more cheese bun into her mouth.


	9. Chapter 9

Peeta is whistling—and he’s actually quite good at it—while he sets up the snacks before running club on Tuesday. He’s made it all the way through three songs with a goofy grin on his face the entire time. 

“What’s gotten into the kid?” Haymitch says gruffly to Gale. “Sweetheart finally pay him some attention?”

Gale laughs. “I’d say that’s a pretty good guess,” he says. 

Looking over his shoulder Gale nods his head in the direction of the door. “Speaking of Katniss…” he says, indicating that she has just walked in the door. 

Haymitch turns slowly on his bar stool, giving Katniss the once over as she crosses the room toward the bar. She’s smiling and looks as well rested and happy as he’s seen her in quite awhile. “Well, well, well,” he says, smirking at her. “What’s got you in such a good mood?”

This comment elicits the expected scowl from Katniss, causing both Haymitch and Gale to laugh. “That’s more like it,” says Haymitch, raising his glass of clear liquor in a mock toast to Katniss. 

But Katniss only ignores him and moves right on past to where Peeta is putting out napkins with the snacks. 

“Hi Peeta,” she says. “Need some help?” 

Peeta smiles brightly at her. “Nope, all set. But thanks,” he replies. 

She smiles back at him and together they stand there grinning at each other for a moment. 

“Oh I almost forgot,” he says, turning suddenly and reaching below the tabletop to retrieve a bag sitting on the floor. “I brought you you’re daily supply.” He hands her the bag, giving her a wink. 

She gets the joke as soon as she looks inside. There, stuffed into the white paper bag, are four plump cheese buns. Katniss licks her lips in anticipation, oblivious to the fact that Peeta can’t take his eyes of her mouth during the process. 

“Mmmmm, Peeta,” she says, her voice unintentionally seductive. “You just might be my new best friend.” 

“Not what he’s going for, sweetheart,” Haymitch pipes up as he passes near the two of them on his way to the back room. 

“Shut up Haymitch,” Katniss retorts, blushing crimson. Peeta is also a rosy hue, but he chuckles. 

….

He doesn’t bring her cheese buns every single day, like they joked in the bakery, but he does bring them every time they see each other. In between the days they run with the running club, they text briefly, at least once a day, and usually at night right before Katniss turns off the lamp and goes to sleep. For some reason, these brief conversations with Peeta make the sleep come easier and she’s having fewer nightmares, too. The result is that she’s more well rested and relaxed than she’s been in a long time. 

They begin meeting on Saturday mornings to run, as well. She drives to the bakery to wait while he finishes the early work and then together they take off in the tree-lined neighborhood. Sometimes the conversation flows freely and sometimes they simply run in companionable silence. Either way, Katniss finds that she enjoys the easy camaraderie she has found in Peeta. 

Then one Thursday evening they are running with the group from The Hob when thunderheads begin to gather in the West. Several group members in the front of the pack decide to cut the run short and head back toward the brewery since it looks like it may storm. A few decide to try to get in another mile or two before turning back. 

Katniss glances at Peeta and through a sort of unspoken agreement, they decide to keep running a bit longer. They’ve been doing this for a while now—communicating without really saying anything out loud. It’s especially nice when they’re running and out of breath, to be able to say things with just a nod or a meaningful look. 

But despite being so in sync, Katniss and Peeta are not very intuitive when it comes to this storm. Within minutes of separating from the majority of the group, the sky darkens and they have to turn back toward the brewery. They’ve only made it another quarter mile before a giant clap of thunder precedes a sudden downpour. 

Katniss is soaked completely through, her shoes sloshing against the pavement and her wet braid slapping against her neck. She doesn’t mind running in the rain, but this is ridiculous—she can barely see a foot in front of her in this downpour. 

Suddenly Peeta grabs her hand and pulls her along, ducking under an awning, in the doorway of a small printing business that has already closed for the day. The rain is blowing sideways, so they aren’t completely protected, even under the little porch, but it’s better than nothing. 

They huddle together, soaking wet in the small space, as near as they can get without actually touching. Then a clap of loud thunder causes them to both startle and jump into one another, practically bumping heads. 

Katniss is the first to laugh. Pure, musical, unhindered laughter. Peeta joins her, reaching up to put his hand over the top of her head gently. “Are you okay?” he asks, his eyes shiny with amusement over the situation. 

It takes this gesture—his hand on her head—to make her aware of just how closely they are standing now. She’s tucked into the doorway, his larger, athletic body shielding her, and her hands are firmly planted on his strong chest. If she wanted to push him away, she’d be in the perfect position. But she doesn’t want to, she realizes; she wants to stay right here, protected.

She looks up at him, eyes wide. “I’m—“ she starts to answer, but she’s stopped by the way he’s looking at her now. The amusement is gone from his eyes and instead she finds something closer to reverence there. He’s looking at her like she’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever laid eyes on and she knows, or hopes rather, that he’s going to kiss her now. 

He pushes some of the wet hair that is matted to her face off her forehead, running his thumb down the side of her cheek at the same time he leans down, closing the space between their lips. “Katniss,” he breathes, just before he presses his lips to hers gently. 

It would be a lie to say she hasn’t thought about what it would be like to kiss Peeta Mellark. When she’s thought about it, before, she’s always worried that he will be able to tell she is fairly inexperienced. She’s only kissed two people, and one was on a dare in the seventh grade; the other was Gale, but that has been water under the bridge for a long time now. 

But right now, in the moment, she doesn’t think of any of this. Instead, she gets lost in discovering Peeta—the way he kisses her so gently, yet firmly; the way his lips are so warm, and the way his right hand trails down her cheek and behind her neck to tangle in her wet hair while his other hand draws her in, a warm presence on her lower back through the wet material of her running shirt.

Katniss sighs contentedly and opens her mouth, allowing him to deepen the kiss. He tastes exactly the way the bakery smells, mixed with a little bit of fresh rainwater that is currently running in rivulets down both of their faces. When they finally break apart, Peeta kisses a few extra drops of water off her face before looking into her eyes and giving her one of his glorious smiles. She can’t help but return the smile in full force. 

His hands are still on either side of her face, where they had landed by the end of the kiss, and hers are still trapped between them, flush against his chest. He tilts his head to the side, nodding ever so slightly. “I think it slowed down,” he says, indicating the storm. 

“Yeah,” she says, her eyes never leaving his face, taking in the way his hair is slightly darker when it’s this wet, and the way the freckles across the bridge of his nose are only really noticeable this close up. 

He grins and leans down to capture her lips once again. 

……

Katniss doesn’t know how long they stand there kissing in the doorway of the printing company. She only knows that it feels right—perfect, really. 

And then together they make their way back to The Hob, the sound of the rainwater squishing in their running shoes keeping time with the pavement. By the time they make it back all Katniss wants is a hot shower and a warm drink. She heads home, giving Peeta a small wave on the way out. 

 

 

She hasn’t even made it out of the shower before the regret sets in. ‘What are you doing Katniss? This will never work,’ she tells herself. 

When she’s dry and changed into sweats, a warm cup of tea wrapped in her hand, she hears the text message alert. She knows it’s him. 

Peeta: All dry? I think my shoes might be permanently ruined. Ha. Worth it, though. ;-)

She doesn’t know how to respond. She doesn’t know how she should feel. At the time she knows she wanted to kiss him—wanted him to kiss her—but now that she’s removed from the situation she’s panicking. 

A few minutes later he tries again. 

Peeta: Katniss, everything ok? Anyway, just wanted to make sure you got home ok and tell you that I can’t wait to see you again. 

Her fingers hover over the buttons for too long to warrant the response she ends up typing. 

Katniss: home safe. goodnight


	10. Chapter 10

She dreams about him. In her dream they’re on a beach, and despite an overwhelming sense of looming danger, she feels safe; knows that he will protect her. And he’s kissing her again. That same fluttering sensation starts in her middle and radiates, warming her entire body. She could stay with him like this forever. Everything else fades away…

And then she’s jolted awake by her alarm. 

Katniss groans, reaching for her phone to silence the alarm and check for any missed calls or messages while she was asleep. One missed call and one text message. The call is from Joanna—only Joanna would call someone at 11:45 on a work night and expect them to answer. She didn’t leave a voice mail so it must not be important. 

The message, of course, is from Peeta. It simply says, “goodnight Katniss,” in response to her previous text from last night. She had turned her phone off as soon as she sent him the dismissive message. He probably sent this only moments later, but seeing it now, after her vivid dream only serves to remind her of the conflicting feelings tangled up in the confines of her mind. 

She’s torn between the way Peeta Mellark makes her feel and what she knows is the right thing to do: not get involved. 

She never meant to get attached to him. Getting too close to someone is never a good idea, because inevitably that will be taken from her — snatched away by some horrible fluke accident, like her father…like her sister. More likely Peeta will walk away on his own accord, once he figures out how messed up and incapable of honest emotion she truly is now. That’s why her own mother left, so why would he stay?

Thinking of her sister only steels her resolve. It doesn’t matter how many pleasant dreams she has, or how much her body yearns to be wrapped in his arms again—she simply can’t get any more wrapped up in whatever is happening between she and Peeta. 

Katniss finishes off her braid with an extra tight knot at the end and heads off to the lab for work, all traces of her dream and the kiss in the rain the previous day firmly pushed to the back of her mind. Right where she plans on keeping them. 

…..

“Where were you last night? Out on a hot date?” Joanna pounces on her before she even has time to shrug on her lab coat. 

“Jo, you called at midnight. I was asleep!” Katniss retorts. 

“Sorry, I forgot you’re like eighty years old,” Joanna responds, laughing at the sour expression Katniss is wearing. “Anyway, I was calling to tell you that we have plans tonight.”

“We?” Katniss says unenthusiastically. 

“Yes, ‘we’ brainless. We’re going out. I need to get you drunk so I can get you to spill about this bread boy you’re so hung up on,” Joanna says matter of factly. 

“I’m not hung up on him,” Katniss says, and even she recognizes that her voice is a little too defiant. 

Joanna eyes her curiously. “Why so defensive, Kit Kat?” she finally says, leaning back against the countertop as if she’s intends to continue this conversation for a long while. 

“I just…Jo I don’t want to talk about this right now,” Katniss finally says. 

“Precisely,” says Joanna. “That’s why we’re getting you drunk tonight.” She flashes Katniss a wicked grin and saunters away. 

….

Peeta is at least smart enough to back off and give her space. That’s what she wants, isn’t it? But if that’s true, then it doesn’t explain why Katniss checks her phone at least two dozen times during the day to see if there is a new message from him. And it certainly doesn’t explain the odd, empty feeling in the pit of her stomach when a message never appears. 

Katniss relents to going out with Joanna—it is Friday, after all—but only if they go somewhere other than The Hob. 

“No way,” Joanna retorts. “I already told Gale we were coming and this way we kill two birds with one stone.” 

“What does that mean?” Katniss says, her displeasure coming through clearly in her tone. 

“It means I get to catch up with Gale and you at the same time. And besides, he needs to be in on this. No sense in you having the same conversation with both of us at two different times,” she says. 

“Who said I was going to have ANY conversation with either of you?” Katniss says irritably. 

….

The Hob is busy, even for a Friday night, and Katniss silently prays to the universe that a certain someone is not among the large crowd in the brewery. A careful glance around the parameters of the main room does not reveal any blond curls or infectious smiles, so she considers herself momentarily safe. 

“Looking for someone?” Gale teases her from his place behind the bar. 

“She’s looking for lover boy,” Joanna quips, throwing her oversized purse across the bar top and scooting into one of only two open bar stools. “Stash that for me, will ya?” she directs at Gale, indicating that he should put her purse behind the bar so she doesn’t have to hang on to it. “It’s better if Peeta’s not here,” she continues. “If we want to get anything out of this one.” She waves her hand in Katniss’ general area. 

Katniss slides onto the next bar stool and sighs. “I told you, there’s nothing to tell,” she says.   
“That’s not what you said,” says Joanna. “You said, ‘I don’t want to talk about it right now’—there’s a difference.” 

….

Five amber beers later Katniss is officially lubricated enough to spill her inner thoughts. She’s still not sure why she agreed to drink so much, especially since she knew Joanna’s plan from the get-go. But it’s Friday night, and it’s been a long week and she definitely needs the release of tension that several potent drinks naturally bring. 

She’s not completely trashed—only hard liquor can make her completely inebriated, but she’s lost much of her filter and she feels warm and much more trusting than she usually does. Joanna doesn’t even need to bring up the topic herself; Katniss does it for her. 

“Oh shit!” she exclaims suddenly, around 11 pm. 

“What?” Gale smirks. He’s still working behind the bar, going in and out from the back room and stopping by the spot where Joanna and Katniss sit whenever he has a moment to breathe. 

“I can’t run,” Katniss says, as if that says it all. 

Joanna and Gale share an amused look. 

“Yeah, highly recommend that you don’t run right now,” Joanna says, smirking. 

“No, no,” Katniss waves her hand at Joanna as if she’s swatting away an imaginary fly. “I mean I can’t run in the morning. We run together on Saturday mornings. And I can’t.” 

“Why can’t you?” Gale asks. 

“You run with bread boy?” Joanna asks, at the exact same time. 

“Not anymore,” says Katniss, a gloomy tone taking over her entire demeanor. “He ruined it.”

“You’ll be too hung over to run tomorrow morning anyway,” Gale says dismissively, walking away to tend to another customer who has been trying to gain his attention. 

Joanna turns to face Katniss, her entire attention focused now that she sees her opening. “How did he ruin it?” she asks. “What happened?”

“Nothing!” Katniss is trying to sort out her thoughts and keep certain ones to herself, but it’s not working quite the way she wants. Damn Gale and his overly potent craft brewed beer! “It was just the rain…” she adds, trying and failing to steer Joanna off track. 

“And…” Joanna pries. “Did you get wet?” She laughs at her own joke. 

Joanna is expecting Katniss’ trademark scowl to be the answer to her crude, lame joke, but she surprised when she looks back at Katniss to see her eyes wide and her face blanched. 

“We kissed,” Katniss says quietly. “We kissed in the rain and I can’t stop thinking about it. But I have to. I have to stop.” Katniss tries to straighten on her bar stool to indicate how serious she is, despite the fact that she is slurring her words slightly. 

Joanna smiles down into her beer glass, satisfied to have gotten this much out of Katniss. “Why?” she asks, pausing to take another drink of her beer. “This is good Katniss. You need this. You don’t have to stop anything.”

Katniss is shaking her head softly from side to side. “No,” she says. “I have to stop him from making a big mistake. I’m not who he thinks.”

Joanna finishes off the last of the lager in her glass and turns to Katniss, placing her hands on Katniss’ shoulders. “Look, I know you’re scared because you think anything good that comes along will be taken from you,” she says, giving Katniss a significant look. “But you deserve to be happy. And this bread boy seems to be doing just that. You’ve been practically a ray of fucking sunshine since you met him—up until today, that is,” she finishes. 

But Katniss pushes away from the bar, simultaneously pushing away all hope of having anything with Peeta. “No,” she says, and she seems suddenly much more sober. “You don’t understand.”

Joanna shakes her head, weary of going round and round with Katniss. She should have known that Katniss would build up walls so tall and thick no one could bring them down. “Fine,” she says, dismissively. “But I think you’re making a big mistake.”

“I’m tired,” says Katniss. “I’m going to head home.” 

“You can’t drive right now,” Joanna points out, correctly. 

“I’ll walk,” Katniss says. 

The air has started to turn cooler at night with the approach of autumn. By the time Katniss arrives home after her brisk walk she is almost completely sober and even more determined than ever. She and Peeta can just be friends and nothing more. He will just have to understand. They will both have to forget that kiss in the thunderstorm and go back to the way it was before.

If only it were that easy.


	11. Chapter 11

She sends Peeta a very blunt text message, that same night, about not meeting him to run the next morning.

K: “Sorry to text so late. I can’t run in the morning.”

Then she turns off her phone and crawls under the covers where she promptly falls into a beer induced sleep.

Her sleep is deep and dreamless. When she wakes several hours later, her mouth is predictably dry and her head aches slightly. It’s not the worst she’s ever felt after a night out, but she is still glad she’s not heading out on a run this morning. She’s even more glad that she doesn’t have to face Peeta, she thinks.

As if on cue, her phone chimes with a new message.

P: “Just saw this. Everything ok?”

“Argggghhh” Katniss groans. Why does he have to be so understanding and sweet about it? It only makes it harder for her to cut things off with him.

K: “Fine. Just drank too much beer last night.”

His response is immediate.

P: “lol Well maybe a run later on today then?”

K: “Probably not”

This time, she waits several minutes before his response comes.

P: “K; Feel better.”

….

It’s like ripping off a band-aid, she tells herself. The less she sees Peeta, the less chance she will fall back under his easy charm. He’s so easy to like; Too easy to like.

So even though she missed her run altogether on Saturday, and barely made it two miles when she tried to run alone on Sunday and Monday, she makes a conscious decision to skip running club on Tuesday.

She knows by now that Peeta must be wondering what is going on with her evasiveness. But she’s still not ready to face him. She tries not to think about how she might be purposely avoiding him; because the longer she avoids Peeta, the longer she avoids having to tell him that there can’t be anything between them.

….

Joanna, for one, is on to her.

“Talked to bread boy lately?” she asks when she corners Katniss at work the next morning.

“Not really,” Katniss says, shrugging.

Joanna rolls her eyes, visibly annoyed with Katniss’ response.

“So what, he gives you the best kiss of your life and now you’re just going to avoid him for the rest of eternity?” Joanna asks.

“I never said it was…” Katniss begins to murmur, but Joanna cuts her off.

“Whatever brainless. It was written all over your face.”

Katniss flushes deeply. It was the best kiss of her life. That’s probably why she can’t stop dreaming about it in her sleep.

“Listen” Joanna continues. “You know I love you. But I’m not going to stand around and watch you ruin this on purpose. You either talk to him about what’s going on in that pretty little head of yours—or I will.”

Katniss sighs, resigned. Joanna is right: she can’t hide from Peeta forever. It’s probably not what Joanna is hoping for, but Katniss can at least give him an explanation. She decides she will talk to him at running club Thursday night.

…..

“Well, look what the cat dragged in,” Gale teases her when Katniss comes through the door at The Hob early on Thursday afternoon. “Haven’t seen you all week. Thought you might still be hung-over.”

“I’ve been busy,” Katniss counters, shooting him a look that says he should drop it.

“Busy avoiding Peeta?” Gale asks, raising one eyebrow.

“No. Maybe. I don’t know,” Katniss mumbles, suddenly becoming extremely interested in scratching at a rough spot on her elbow.

“You know,” Gale says, suddenly becoming more serious, “if you’re playing hard to get, it’s working. But if you’re not, then you should knock it off now because he’s seriously confused.”

Katniss’ head snaps up and she looks Gale in the eye. “What do you mean?” she asks, her voice betraying exactly how much it bothers her that Peeta might be upset by her recent actions.

“I mean, Catnip, that he looked like a lost puppy in here on Tuesday when you didn’t show up,” Gales says.

“Did he say anything?” she asks.

“No, but I did,” Gale quips, turning to toss the rag he’s been holding into the sink behind the bar.

“Gale, what?!” she can hear her voice rising several octaves but she can’t stop the sound of desperation.

Gale holds up his hand, palm out in the universal symbol that means “stop.”

“All I said was that he should give you some time to come around,” Gale says, his voice softening.

Katniss nods wordlessly.

“Talk to him, Catnip,” Gale tells her, giving her one last pointed look before he turns and heads toward the back room.

“I will,” Katniss says, her voice barely above a whisper.

….

But she chickens out.

Peeta must be running slightly late today because most of the other runners are already warmed up and ready to head out when Katniss sees his jeep pull into the parking lot. Before she can stop herself, she takes off with the first wave of runners, not even glancing back to see Peeta make his way through the front doors of The Hob.

It’s been days since she last ran, and if she’s being honest with herself that isn’t the only reason she’s running a bit more slowly than usual. It shouldn’t surprise her when he catches up to her easily after only a mile.

“Katniss,” he says, coming up on her left side and slowing his pace to fall in beside her.

“Hey Peeta,” she says, not even daring to look over at him.

“I haven’t seen you all week. How is everything?” he asks, and she hates that she can hear the caution in his voice.

“Fine,” she says shortly. She blows an audible puff of air between her lips, effectively displacing a wisp of hair that has come undone from her braid and keeps landing across her face, between her eyes.

“Great,” he says, but there is an edge of annoyance to his normally easy demeanor.

They run along silently for a while before he tries again.

“Can I ask you something?” he questions, his voice is mild, but tight.

“Sure,” she says, but even she can hear how stiff she sounds. It’s like they’ve gone back weeks. Back to before the kiss; back to before they were even friends.

“Did I upset you somehow?” he asks.

“No,” she says shortly, and it takes everything in her to not look at him right now. Just one glimpse of his blue eyes will be her undoing, and she knows it.

As if in answer to her own inner thoughts, she increases her pace slightly, but noticeably.

But he isn’t willing to let it go that easily. “Katniss,” he says, putting his hand on her arm and stopping her in the middle of the street. “What are you running from?”

She finally looks him in the eyes and it throws her emotions for a loop, just as she knew it would. “I…I…” she stammers, her thoughts scattering.

“Is this about the kiss?” he asks. Just for a moment she gets caught up in those deep, ocean blue eyes piercing her very soul with sincerity.

But she shakes herself free from his soul-searching eyes, glancing just above his right shoulder and taking a deep breath to steady herself before she answers.

“Look, let’s just forget about it,” she says coolly.

“That’s the problem,” Peeta says, and his voice has become thick with emotion. “I don’t want to forget.”

Then he turns and jogs away, back toward The Hob, leaving Katniss standing in the middle of the road feeling even more unsettled than before.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my, I am SO sorry for how long I let this story sit. I truly feel terrible. It's true I've been very busy in RL with work, etc, but I have missed this story and I hate that you may have been waiting or even given up on an ending. 
> 
> It may help to go back and re-read Chapter 11 before you start this chapter. This story is going to wrap up soon and I am almost done with the last chapters so it won't be as long of a wait this time--I promise!
> 
> Thank you for reading!

It takes her a full 30 seconds to regain her senses and stop staring after him. 

Then she automatically turns and starts back on their usual route, only to realize after another half mile that she made a really, really big mistake by not chasing him down. She really owes him an explanation. 

So she turns back around and heads back toward The Hob, hoping to overtake him as he finishes up his run. She makes it all the way back to the brewery, though, without ever catching up to Peeta. Confused, she yanks open the front door and strides through the bar, swiveling her head back and forth to try to catch a glimpse of him. There’s just a small crowd, plus a handful of runners who have already made it back and are ordering a post-run beer, but Katniss still doesn’t see any sign of Peeta. 

“Gale,” she says, smacking her hands down on the top of the bar to get his attention. “Did you see Peeta come back?”

Gale barely looks up from the beer he’s pulling from the tap, but he gives a slight a nod toward the side windows that look out toward the parking lot. “You just missed him,” he says. 

When Katniss’ eyes follow his direction, she sees the back of Peeta walking away. She makes a mad dash back out the front door and around the side of the building, reaching the parking lot just as Peeta tosses a bag into the back of his Jeep and opens the driver side door. 

“Peeta! Wait!” she calls. “Wait!”

He pauses, his hand on the top of his door, one foot resting on the floorboard of the Jeep and the other on the ground. Slowly, he turns his head to look at her, and she can see, even from several yards away, that he looks exhausted. 

He waits until she’s only a few feet away, but he still doesn’t say a word; he just stands there, waiting. 

“Peeta, I….” Katniss begins, wringing her hands together and staring at the toes of her shoes. “I owe you an explanation.”

Peeta tosses his keys on to the drivers seat of the Jeep and turns to face her fully, arms crossed across his chest. “Okay,” he says, simply.

“Okay,” she responds. She takes a deep breath and exhales shakily. “Okay, so that came out wrong before. “

He nods at her, but his face is softening and his stance is more relaxed. 

“I’m just not good at this,” Katniss continues, waving her hand vaguely back and forth to indicate the two of them. She sighs loudly and continues. 

“I’m, uh, not sure if Gale or Haymitch or anyone told you, but I’m not really good about getting to know people because…well, because they don’t tend to stick around,” she says. 

“Katniss,” Peeta interjects softly. 

“Just—“ She holds up her hand to stop him. “It’s okay. I just wanted you to know that it’s me, and not you.”

Peeta laughs quietly and without humor. “This sounds like the part where you tell me to have a nice life. I get it Katniss,” he says, turning to open the door to his Jeep once again. 

“Peeta, my Dad died when I was eleven,” Katniss begins. “And then my sister was hit by a car right in front of me when I was seventeen. She died a few days later.”

Peeta turns back toward her again, his eyes filled with unshed tears. “Katniss, that’s terrible. I’m so sorry,” he says, moving toward her and wrapping his arms around her without hesitation. Immediately she feels safer and more steady than she has all day; all week, really. It gives her the courage to continue. 

“My Mom couldn’t stand to look at me after that, I guess, because she took off a few months later, and I never heard from her again,” Katniss says, her words muffled in the sleeve of Peeta’s t-shirt. Peeta releases her and places his hands on her shoulders so he can look her in the eyes. 

“I’m fine now, really,” she continues, wiping quickly at the two tears that have formed at the edges of her eyes. She laughs bitterly. “I mean, I know I seem like a total mess, but I’ve come a long way. I know now what it costs to love someone, and I know it’s not worth it.” 

There is a long pause while they both just stand there staring at each other silently. Peeta lets his hands drop from her shoulders, a contemplative look on his face. Finally Katniss says, “I totally get it if you want to take off now. Most people do.” 

He skakes his head, drawing in a deep breath and exhaling loudly. “I don’t think you understand, Katniss,” he says, and he reaches out and touches the end of her braid, just barely. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Her eyes are threatening to spill tears for real this time and she offers him the only thing she can at the moment, a small, watery smile. “I just wish it was that easy,” she tells him honestly. 

…..

“Well?” Haymitch asks, as soon as Katniss walks back into the brewery. 

“Well, what?” Katniss retorts. 

“Did you tell loverboy your story? Tell him about how you’re on a one-woman mission to avoid making personal connections for the rest of your life?” Haymitch smirks at her before taking another swig from his flask. 

“Shut-up, Haymitch,” she says. 

“So it went well, did it? How’d he take it?” Haymitch continues to taunt her, undeterred. “Probably saw right through your misguided self-placed armor and promised to stand by you to the dying end, right?”

Katniss tries to glare at Haymitch but it’s hard when his assessment is so disarmingly accurate. 

“He said he’s not going anywhere,” Katniss replies softly. “But I just have to try harder to convince him.”

“Convince him of what,” Haymitch asks, sounding more annoyed with her. 

“That I’m not worth it,” Katniss says calmly. 

Haymitch laughs, slapping his hand on his knee and shaking his head from side to side in disbelief. Finally he stands, tucks his flask back into his inside pocket and puts his worn fedora on top of his balding head. “You know, the boy was right. You really don’t have any idea,” he mutters as we walks off toward the door. 

No idea about what? Katniss wonders silently. 

…

It doesn’t matter that Peeta wants to stick around, Katniss reasons; she still can’t be this involved with someone. Even if that someone still makes her heart swoop into her stomach every time she sees him across the room. They can be good friends; that’s all, she thinks resolutely. There’s no more room in her life for heartbreak, and that’s exactly what she’ll be dealing with if she doesn’t stand her ground now. 

But she never counted on how patient Peeta could be; how hard he would be willing to work to earn her trust. 

They really only see each other at The Hob now, on running club nights. He’s backed off, giving her space, and hasn’t texted or asked her to run on Saturdays or meet at all. And she should be grateful, really, but she still finds herself acting like a stranger when he’s around. It’s like she’s hard wired to shut down and push people away. 

And yet there he is, as patient and perfect as ever, offering her reassuring smiles and pleasant jokes in response to her awkwardness. 

Finally feels like she has no other choice: she stops coming to running club.


	13. Chapter 13

Even though Katniss stops going to running club, she can’t avoid The Hob completely. After all, her best friend owns the place. 

On Wednesday when she stops by to see Gale, he leans down under the bar as soon as she walks through the door. He quickly retrieves a white box, which he sets in front of her as she takes a spot near the end of the bar. 

“He left this for you,” Gales says, his voice filled with impatience for this game of avoidance Katniss has been playing with Peeta. 

Katniss plucks at the white string tied around the bakery box, unwilling to open it and succumb to whatever temptation lies inside. No matter what it turns out to be, it will only serve as a metaphor for the temptation that the baker himself has become. 

“Are you going to open that or play with it?“ Gale asks, clearly annoyed. “Every time he’s in here he asks about you, you know.” 

Katniss has worked the string loose and ducks her head to peer inside the box, but before her eyes register the flakey pastries, she already knows the box is filled with cheese buns. They aren’t warm like they would be when they were first baked, but the savory aroma still fills her senses. 

“You should call him,” Gale says, dropping his elbows down to rest on the bar directly in front of her. “He’s a good guy.”

“I know,” Katniss replies weakly. “I just….” She trails off, unable to explain that she’s distancing herself for Peeta’s benefit; to protect him. She closes the box and pushes it back across the bar toward Gale. She can’t accept these. 

Gale shakes his head in defeat and turns around. He’s still not facing her when he says, “I’ll tell him you said thanks.”

…

There are no more cheese buns waiting at the bar for her after that. Katniss rarely sees Peeta there now, but when she does, once or twice a month, she continues to ignore him and act strange. He seems to have taken the hint, because he no longer approaches her or even glances her way. 

Except for one Friday night just before Christmas, when Joanna has convinced Katniss to have a few beers after a long week at work. Peeta and a group of friends are there and already several drinks in when Katniss arrives. 

She sees him as soon as she walks through the door—at a table full of loud, laughing friends, most of them she recognizes from the running club. His eyes lock on hers immediately and he looks away, taking another swig of his beer. He seems to make a point of not looking back in her direction. 

“You don’t deserve him, you know,” Haymitch tells Katniss before she can even pull out a stool to sit a the bar. She scowls but she doesn’t offer a retort. “He’s been nothing but patient with you; But it looks like he’s finally come to his senses,” Haymtich continues. 

“Are you finished?” Katniss sighs, exasperated. No one knows how painful it is for her to watch Peeta become so distant and cold, even if she was the one who wanted it that way. 

“I’m just saying: You could live a hundred lifetimes and still not….uh oh…” Haymitch trails off, his thought unfinished. Something behind Katniss has caught his attention. 

Despite herself, Katniss turns in time to see a clearly drunken Peeta lift Delly off her feet and spin her around. And even though she knows she should turn away, Katniss is unable to stop staring as the two slow to a halt and Peeta takes Delly’s face into his hands and presses an awkward, forceful kiss on her mouth. 

It doesn’t matter, Katniss thinks, turning away in disgust. But a sudden lurch in her stomach has her heading for the restroom and then out the back door of the bar. She doesn’t stop walking until she reaches home. Which is why she’s not there to see Delly push Peeta away playfully and respond to his overzealous kiss with the remark, “Oh Peeta, don’t be silly. You’re too drunk to know what you’re even doing.” 

But Haymitch sees it; and he also sees the way Peeta looks over to where Katniss had been sitting, a mix of regret and longing clouding his features. 

……

Katniss tosses and turns that night, unable to sleep. She punches her pillow, unable to pinpoint why she’s so angry about seeing Peeta kiss Delly. No, that’s not why she’s upset. Not exactly. After hours of restlessness, she realizes the person she’s angry with is herself. Because it seems like she’s succeeded in making her point and gaining her distance from Peeta, but at what cost? Why can’t she move on now that she has what she supposedly wanted?

…..  
She’s miserable. Joanna points this out several times a day. And not always in the nicest way. 

“You happy now?” she taunts Katniss one blustery day in January. “You pushed away baker boy, you won’t let me set you up on a date, you—“ 

“Jo! For the last time I’m not going out with your cousin Blight,” Katniss interrupts. 

“Well anyway, you’re miserable and you need to get laid,” huffs Joanna. “Quite frankly we all agree that you made a huge mistake pushing away Peeta.”

“Who’s ‘we all’,” Katniss questions with narrowed eyes. She has a sneaking suspicion she knows exactly who Joanna means.  
….

Her suspicions are confirmed later that week when she sees Gale. She calls him out on it. 

“So you and Joanna agree I made a “huge” mistake,” she says, using her fingers to make air quotes around the word huge. 

Gale chuckles but when he sees how set her jaw is, he changes tactics. “Look Katniss…”

Katniss’ eyebrows shoot up at the use of her real name. Gale only calls her that when he’s angry or extremely serious. 

He sighs, wipes his hands on the bar rag he’s holding before tossing it behind him. “You’re my best friend, but I think you made an ass of yourself with Peeta,” he says. 

At the first sounds of her protesting, he holds up his hand. “Let me finish,” he goes on. “It would be one thing if you hurt the guy because you decided you just didn’t want to be with him. It would be rude, sure, but I could at least understand why you did it.”

Katniss clears her throat, looking everywhere but at Gale. She feels warm and she knows her face is turning seven shades darker with every word that leaves his mouth. It’s not unlike Gale to call her out but she can tell this time it’s different. 

He continues, “But what I can’t understand is you moping around miserable, knowing that you’ve made him miserable, and all for absolutely no reason whatsoever. Because, Katniss, look at me…” 

She lifts her head, trying to give him a defiant glare, but her eyes are betraying her as they fill with tears. 

“Because Katniss, anyone who’s been within 10 yards of you the last few months can see it written all over your face. You DO want to be with him. And I think you know that you’ve made a big mistake. And frankly, I’m tired of watching you ruin your life.”

Katniss could not have felt differently if Gale had just slapped her face. She stares at him in shock for several moments before mutely turning and walking stiffly out the door. She takes several large gulps of the icy air, feeling the tears finally tumbling down her cheeks. The thing is, she does know now that pushing Peeta away was a huge mistake. She thought that if she could keep him at arm’s length she would feel less and risk less, but all it’s done is make her even more miserable. 

The problem is, even now that she knows, she doesn’t know how to fix it. And she’s still too stubborn to say anything.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter. Again, sorry that I took such a long break before finishing this story. I really appreciate all the readers and the comments and messages! I have a few ideas for upcoming stories, so I will start another one soon. Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think!--C

Katniss ponders both Joanna and Gale’s words over the next few days. She knows the ball is in her court, but she doesn’t know what to do. She can’t exactly call Peeta up and expect him to graciously pick back up where they left off that day of the kiss in the rain. Even approaching him and trying to regain his friendship will be difficult after all these months. 

But she craves his voice, and his warmth. Needs him, really. She gasps the first time she realizes this. She needs him. He’s her only hope against her nightmares; against the dark places in her mind. He’s her only hope for lasting happiness. 

Still, she thinks it is probably too late to win back the boy with the bread. 

….

Gale doesn’t tells her when the running club will be resuming in the Spring, so Katniss is blindsided the day she walks into the Hob and sees Peeta again. He looks so good. Strong and beaming that natural light he tends to give off. But he falters when he sees her. His smile seems forced although he’s perfectly nice when he greets her. 

He has cheese buns for the runners and is setting them up on a nearby table and Katniss approaches him to try and say something—anything. She’s not sure if it’s an apology she’s offering or what, but once she’s in front of him she can only stumble out a vague, “hey.”

He seems surprised that she’s approached him. His eyebrows go up a bit, his lip quirks into a small smile. “Hey,” he offers back, softly. Katniss is intensely uncomfortable and completely unable to formulate any further words. 

“What did you come over here for Katniss?” he finally asks, but there is no malice in his voice, only confusion. 

“I just wanted to see how you’ve been,” she finally manages to work out. 

“I thought it might be the lure of the cheese buns,” he jokes in his old familiar way. And she can’t help a tiny smile. 

….

It’s a start, at least. She knows that the brief conversation they shared is far from rebuilding their friendship, but she’s relieved to have taken the first step. He didn’t yell at her or outright ignore her, so that’s good. 

She climbs the last few steps to the top of the ridge where she’s hiked this Saturday morning, something that has always helped her to clear her head. Thoughts of seeing Peeta again the other day at The Hob keep swirling around inside her head and she’s unsure of what comes next. 

Katniss sits down on one of the rocks jutting out high over the valley below, taking in the serene view. Spring has come and the trees below are beginning to bud, a pale green taking over the land where only bare, brown land had been before. She takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, relaxing in one of her favorite spots. 

It all comes down to this: it was a big mistake to push Peeta away. She’s missed his infectious enthusiasm and his optimism. Seeing him at The Hob has only reinforced her feelings. She felt safe and steady with him around; she was sleeping well for the first time since her sister had died. 

She reaches up and wipes away the tears that have started to trail down her cheeks unbidden, but they keep flowing. Katniss weeps openly there on the ridge, finally letting all her anquish and bottled up feelings out. When she’s finally all cried out she feels oddly lighter and yet exhausted. She knows she should turn back now and hike the 2 miles back to the trailhead. As she stands to leave, she takes in the scenery one last time and it is then that she notices the crop of dandelions that has managed to creep up and grow between two rocks, finding the sunlight and a place to lay roots against all odds. 

A wide smile spreads across Katniss’ face. “Against all odds,” she says out loud. I have to at least try to get Peeta back, she thinks. Suddenly she is energized. She knows exactly what she wants and exactly what she will do now. She plucks several of the dandelion stems and begins to hum one of her father’s old cheerful tunes as she makes her way excitedly back down the trail. 

…..

He’s not at the bakery. Katniss frowns in disappointment when Peeta’s brother, Rye, explains that Peeta is already gone for the day. From the look of trepidation on Rye’s face, Katniss can tell that Peeta has told him about how cold and unfeeling she has treated Peeta these last few months. But something in her expression must get to him because finally Rye relents, “He’s over at that bar….The Hob…” 

Katniss doesn’t let him finish. “Thank you!” she blurts out, and then completely out of character, she grabs him in a quick hug before running out the door. 

….

It’s only as she’s pulling into the parking lot at The Hob that she regrets not going home to change first. Or really, a shower would have been a huge plus right now. Dried sweat clings to her skin from her earlier hike and her hair is coming out of her messy braid in all directions. Screw it, she thinks. She’s determined to tell Peeta how she feels and this can’t wait even one more minute. 

He’s there, near the windows where he always sets up the snacks for running club, although Katniss briefly notes that it is not a running club day. Still, he’s arranging small sandwiches and other snacks for some sort of small event. 

Katniss strides straight over to him, not even offering a glance at Gale and Haymitch near the bar. Peeta’s face is a mask of concentration on his task, and he doesn’t even look up as she approaches him. When he finally does he seems surprised to see that it’s Katniss standing right next to him. 

“Katniss,” he says, and even she can tell that he’s working hard to keep his face neutral, “Did you need something?”

“No, I…I just wanted to talk to you. I miss you,” she chokes out. “I never meant to ruin our friendship and I….” she trails off. He’s watching her intently. He clearly wasn’t expecting this outpouring of honesty; not now and especially not here in the bar where there are spectators. Something in his face changes after a moment, as if he’s decided something. 

“You didn’t ruin it,” he says, sighing. “We both did. You needed some space or more time, or whatever and I acted like a wounded jerk.”

“Peeta no!” she interjects. “I pushed you away. I’m….it’s hard to explain but this is not what I wanted. I never wanted you to stop talking to me.”

He’s playing with some small cut flowers that he’s been arranging in beer glasses on the table. They’re dandelions, actually, and she realizes he must have just gathered them from the patch of grass in the lot out behind the brewery. He twists one around and around on the stem, then offers it out to her. “How about we start over,” he suggests. “As friends.” 

“No” she says, “I don’t want to be friends.” She can see the light go out of his eyes immediately, but she rushes on. “Peeta, I don’t want to be friends because…I’m not good with words…” she’s flustered and finally she just acts, rather than continue bumbling her words. She brings her hand from behind her back where she is still holding the stems of now wilted dandelions she picked up on the ridge when she had her revelation during her hike. 

“I saw these, earlier, and I knew…I just knew what I had to do. That I had to tell you,” she thrusts the dandelions towards him, urging him to take the bright yellow weed that symbolizes the hope she has for regaining his trust…and perhaps even his love. 

He’s working it out, she can see it in his face. They’re both standing there holding dandelions out to one another in what? A peace offering? More? His question is answered when she reaches forward and places her hands on either side of his face and leans up to press her lips to his. He’s shocked, so he doesn’t kiss her back and when she pulls away only a second later he’s looking at her wide-eyed. 

“Peeta, I need you,” she says, pleading. She sees joy alight in his eyes the moment he truly understands her intentions. And he takes her face in his own hands and kisses her now, having regained his own faculties. The kiss is gentle at first, as if he still can’t believe this is happening, but it quickly deepens as they both pour all of what they are trying to say into the kiss. Peeta’s hands move to her waist and he pulls her in close, possessively, as he slants his mouth and devours her in the way he’s dreamed about for months. With one hand she grips his muscled shoulder, while the other she threads through the curls at the nape of his neck. When she tugs gently on his hair he moans and takes her bottom lip between his, nipping lightly. 

From the bar area Haymitch and Gale clap loudly, causing Katniss and Peeta to break apart briefly and remember exactly where they are standing. 

“’bout damn time they came to their senses,” Haymitch says, turning back to his drink. 

But Katniss can’t even spare him her trademark scowl; she’s too busy beaming up at Peeta, who apparently could also care less what their onlookers think, because he promptly backs her up against the wall and continues kissing her as if it’s the only thing he wants to do for the rest of his life. 

\--End--


End file.
